Parent-Parental Dilemas

I have made a difficult decision as a parent today and it actually doesn't have much to do with raising my son but making a better decision for both him and us.

How to tell GrandPa that comming to his house for Christmas is just a little unrealistic?

I have thought about this since Thanksgiving, when they were at our house. In years past (B.B. before baby) me, Wife and my brother would travel down for the day. Leave in the early morning, leave well after dark. Once comming back in such a snow storm that we were waylaid at the in-laws overnight.

This year after thinking through the logistics our normally 3 hour drive, we would be at least 5 hours traveling by car. Only to subject LilGuns to grandpa, grandma, auntie, uncle, greatgram, friends, family and on and on and on. And who knows what else. Then to drive home the following day. Ugh! no. no. no. Maybe if we were staying a week, it could work. But what normal person has that much vacation time? When do I get to make the decision to stay or go. THIS YEAR, thats when.

So I broke the news tonight and while Im sure it depressed him some, he took it well. I explained the whole thought process, thou im sure he didn't actually HEAR most of it. I'm sure his mind went right into 'the're not comming mode. poor me.' or somthing like that. Ah well, it's done. My stress over the whole thing is fading and hopefully next year Ill feel better about draggin' the boy into the City of Sin.

Blogging is good therapy sometimes. even if the whole world can read it...forever. Sorry for such a lame blog post but this is family crap and I feel that others experience similar issues and its good to share the pain.

Circumcision - final post

Here are the links to Post 1 and Post 2 I wrote on circumcision.

I would like to thank all of the people who have taken the time to leave comments. and some pretty lengthy ones at that. Again, I never thought that there were so many strong feelings on the subject.
I found that the comments that factored most into out decision making process were from nurses/doctors and other parents. I felt that some comments came across as far to 'liberal crunchy' to have much weight in our final decision. And while I mean no disrespect, I am somewhat amazed that some men are putting effort into either stretching out their dick skin or trying to get some put back on.

Guys. Its gone. Move on. There are WAY more important things in life.

So then with that said we have decided to leave our son 'intact'.
In the end the biggest reasons for me were that: 'It is as mother nature intended' and that 'Most of the world leaves it alone.'
And having a European wife I have come to appreciate more European ways of thinking. Meaning that, not everything done in the US is the right way to do things. That other perspectives and bring fresh light on old subjects.

Peace out Homies.

I will never eat steamers the same again.

Circumcision - The Decision.

I am utterly surprised at the 'shit storm' and number of comments that my post on circumcision generated. I never would have imagined it. Early on in my thought process we were going to have the Circ' done. After all, 'that's what's done.' Then I read some and backed off on the decision. I wrote the previous post with a neutral position. This post will focus on comment reply/ discussions and my current train of thought.

More than one Commenter suggested some specific web sites:

• National Organization of Circumcision Institute;
• Circumcision Information and Resource Pages; and
• The Intactivism Pages.

There were also a couple of other web sites suggested:

• Circumcision 'the unkindest cut of all'; and
• Losses fom Circumcision.

I have also read the articles in Mothering magazine. Though, it does seem that there is much more anti-circumcision information available than pro-circ'.
The National Organization of Restoring Men tries to help men reconstruct it. *?. ahh, ohh-kay* but it is an irreversible procedure. And I doubt it can work. You just can't restore natural nerve endings.
The statics seem to be all over the place. One thing I learned that was helpful was that the practice is on the decline in the US. The Mothering magazine published that worldwide only 30% have circum's. 2/3rds of which are Muslim. So, its really the Jews and Muslims that seem to drive a big part of it. Maybe fighting in the Middle East would come to and end if all the men just showed each other their dicks?

The Penis Accords :)

There were pleas in the commenting, not to do it. "Take your whole son home.."
There were many first hand experiences from both men and women. My favorite was from Adam Smith, a 15 year old:

"honestly bro, I really wouldn't do it. I'm 15 and my parents had me "crimped ", watch the videos its pretty gross"

I did read somewhere that Smegma does have some health benefit. Something about anit-

bacterial properties. An argument that kept coming up was that it should be my son's choice. I don't think this is solid since that as parents we need to make decisions for them all the time. This just happens to need a little extra thought.

I once had a gym teacher who told us that when he joined the Navy he had to get circed' before admittance. He and a few guys were there and after the 'procedure' they were all in the same room, And I guess that the nurse was real good looking, so the kept getting boners and making the new cut re-open. "OUCH!" Then they would take smelling salts or something to...ah, soften the rod.

The poll I posted is currently running about 69% No.

This is kind of like having my dogs tail docked, and interesting the hygiene issue is used for that procedure as well. Let me now 'cut to the chase', if you will, and end this shit.

After it all washes out I think the biggest factors in helping make a decision to keep the skin are:

• That the foreskin is natural. It must be there for a reason.
• Removing it is basically plastic surgery, and while plastic surgery can look AWESOME (see Nurse pic, right) it is un-necessary.
  
• The falling statics in the US indicate to me that it is falling out of favor with US doctors. (younger doctors?)
  
  
• It obviously hurts like a son-of-a-bitch when done. So, why are we going through all the steps to have a natural child birth, only to have this unnatural thing done.
  
  

The factors not to keep it are:

• looks for the ladies (well, some of them),
• locker room ridicule, and
• the UTI decrease.

I hope that this adds a real perspective to the debate on circumcision for any new dad's or mom's out there looking for guidance. It's not just statics. It's not just religious. It's not just appearance.

Circumcision Decision...

THAT is the question.

As the inevitable birth-day of my boy approaches my first difficult decision as a father began yesterday. Here's a breakdown of my CIRCUMCISION DECISION:

WIFE: I think you need to do some reading about circumcision. I know you've already made up your mind but, could you do some reading?

GJ: **sigh**All riight. **google. --> circumcision -->** basically I found out nothing new. and actually only served to confuse matters.

On the one side, you decide to have it done. Some people say there is no benefit. Others claim a benefit to hygiene and STDs. The medical reports are inconclusive with no significant differences in results to say one way is better than the other. So, FAIL to science and data. Some say the procedure causes psychological harm and some other namby-pamby bullshit about building trust. I don't remember getting circumcised. Do you?

On the other side, you don't have this 'medically unnecessary procedure' done and:
My son's schween will look like a long necked clam; We have to literally deal with schmegma; There is a 10 times higher chance of urinary tract infection; When is a little older I have to teach him how to 'retract the foreskin' and clean it.

'They' also do say sexual sensitivity is increased. That sounds good but doesn't it really just means that my kid to be a 'two pump chump' later in life?

HOW FUN! :O

The religious angle is out. We're not religious. If I were a Jew this could be easy.

I think after spending about 2 hours total writing this post that I am no closer to a decision. I started off with 'Yes Do It'. Then I went and started thinking and reading. Maybe I should just keep with my first instinct. I think the stats in the US are about 50/50.

I should just flip a coin.

**update**

instead of flipping a coin. I have added an internet poll in the upper right.